It�s been well over a month since I wrote here. Time certainly has a way of getting away from you. To say I have been busy would be an understatement, yet, I never seem to get done. This entire weekend I have spent turning wrenches out back on my trucks. If I can save a little labor here and there, it adds up in the grand scheme of things. Its hard work owning and operating you own business. The stress level involved with decision making is mind bending, not to mention the sheer dependency on others to do their jobs, so that your bottom line in even in the black. Lately I stay in the red, bringing me even more stress, which in turn causes me to work even harder and longer hours in a vain attempt to break even. It doesn�t always happen.

I must also mention that this journal has been found by a person or persons that I work with. In all fairness, I really feel uncomfortable about talking about things that I once did here. That�s the reason those types of entries are longer here. I deleted them. Now I watch what I write. That seems really stupid to me, to have a diary to write my thoughts into, and then not be able to for fear of being treated differently at the work place. This is inherently a major fallback to an online diary. I am at a point that I am not sure what to do. Every Diarylander gets to this point eventually. Why not move again and start over? I�ve asked myself that already. If I do, will I not just face this same problem again at some point in the future? Would I not simply be postponing the decision I now need to make? Most of the people that read these pages are my friends. Some are not. To those who have written and expressed concern and worry of my whereabouts, I thank you. I appreciate your heartfelt notes more than you may know. I love you all very much.

Life here in Danger land is very basically the same, not much has changed beyond the above mentioned items. These days I read far more than I write. My high speed connection isn�t working, so that really slows me down. I have, however, decided to order a cable connection which won�t go down every time a tiny cloud hovers over my house. I think that in and of itself will spawn more interest for me. The sharper individuals may have noticed my little graphic is back again, indicating that I have renewed my Gold membership. Slowly I am vesting myself back into the online world. Slowly.

I think a layout change is in order as well, and I may change the purpose of this diary to simply a creative outlet, and remove the personal items. Should I chose to do this, and create a personal journal for my mind�s eye, I�ll drop an email to my favorites list, or better yet, just ask. I�ve missed you all, and I hope to be here more often in the future.

Good night DiaryLand!

Tonight I sat around waiting for a phone call that I was needed at work. It never came. I worked all weekend on my truck getting it ready for a long week of being out on the road; hopefully back on my Connecticut route. I did more to that truck than I intended to, and was exhausted by the time I collapsed into the bed last evening. Today I was supposed to leave out, but that was cancelled, then an impromptu arrangement for a Texas run collapsed as well. Annoyed, I gave up and told them to call me when and if they needed me, because I could have run a Jackson had I known about the prior arrangements falling through. Irritated I stomped out into the driveway to cut the ignition off my idling truck and was going to go to bed once back in. As I tromped out the carport, I ran through a huge spider web. It had not been there earlier today at five this afternoon after returning from Wal-Mart. I broke through the web and grumbled about all the work I apparently did for naught. It was on my way back into the house that I noticed that spider again. I had broken away the anchor point to her web and it had collapsed in on itself, folding it in half. Undaunted, she was already repairing her web. I stood there in complete awe as I watched her work. Without benefit of word or any noise, she started the task of repairing damage I caused in one second what took her three hours of intensive labor to make. Suddenly, all my problems seemed small and trivial. Often it takes nature�s medicines to cure me of my self importance. I reached out and carefully grasped the strand that was floating in the cool night breeze and slowly pulled it taught. The web while not as beautiful as it had been previously was at least now workable. I have no idea if she abandoned that web or not, I just told her I was sorry and left her to her devices.

Goodnight DiaryLand